自白

Recently I can not almost feel I am a normal person for unhappiness.

Maybe it's because I am always thinking and thinking and thinking and thinking and thinking but not doing.

And if all the ideas and thoughts can not be realized, that would be called bullshit.

I can feel that I'll be thought of as a useless and helpless person because I can only say.

So pathetic I am. I am fucking afraid of being inferior, losing, weak or something like that.

I really need some confidence, why do I lose it?! Or even I haven't had it before.

If hiding and escape can help, probably I will be very happy now.

Why life is so sour and bitter? Somebody answers me.

I want a shell where I can cry my heart out there.

But after crying, I can't thing about what should I do and what can I do.

It hurts me a lot, I mean it.